Dear Older Self, On September 11, 2001 after the twin towers had fallen and the pentagon had taken a direct hit you listened to an interview on the evening news with Mr. Rogers. The question that was put to him was this: “When terrible, scary things happen, what do we tell our children?” Mr. Rogers’ response was, “We should ask our children if they noticed all the helpers.“ Often when we … [Read more...] about Note to Self: Remember God’s help in the past

Dear Older Self, Remember the time you stood at the kitchen counter, grinding coffee beans as your mind whirled with the grinder? You were managing the care of an elderly widow and her needs were in a rapid state of change. Your mind was spinning, trying to anticipate what to do, when to do it, how to find the resources. But your mind came up blank. And the coffee turned out weak and … [Read more...] about Note to Self: Write fear inventory

Dear Older Self, Your body has been amazing. It has kept you going. It has put up with not always being treated kindly. You know, like times when you did not get enough sleep, times when you consumed too much sugar and other not-so-healthy things, times when you pushed and pushed yourself at work. All of this and still your body has carried on. It has been creaky and complain-y at times but it … [Read more...] about Note to Self: Seek input with medical choices

Dear Older Self, This note is somewhere up near the top of the top ten list of notes-I-did-not-want-to-write. I kind of don’t want others to read a word I am about to write. I hope you, being older and wiser, have a better attitude. Okay. Deep breath. So, you know your car key? That one special key that allows you to go where you want, when you want? I need to talk to you about it. I need … [Read more...] about Note to self: Practice safety

Dear Older Self, Your body, which has served you for a long time, is beginning to take leave of its senses. Literally. Hearing, smelling, tasting just are not what they used to be. You know what it is like to eat the over-salted food served by an aging parent. Or to have your ears ring after leaving the room where a television has been blaring so that an elderly loved one could hear it. And … [Read more...] about Note to Self: Invite feedback

Dear Older Self, I know you remember times when you offered help to elderly friends or family members who were truly in need of help, only to have your offer of help refused. You could see they needed more support than they were getting and you offered possible solutions but they were not willing to engage in conversation about their needs. Remember the older man who was leaving his wife … [Read more...] about Note to self: Accept help that is offered

Dear Older Self, I imagine that there are things that you have been accustomed to doing for yourself that you may no longer be able to do. This means, of course, that you will have to rely more and more on others. It also means that you will have to ask for help. If you can find ways to acknowledge your growing need for assistance and even embrace these changes with honesty and humility and … [Read more...] about Note to self: Ask for help directly